Gender reveal parties have become all the rage, ironically, in a time when many try to argue that gender is most certainly not determined by what the doctor says you are in an ultrasound or upon your birth.
Nonetheless, expectant parents love to reveal whether their baby shower will be themed pink or blue with fun, creative “gender reveals” in which parents and guests alike are often learning for the first time what gender their baby will be.
One mother of a young woman who identified as male, however, decided to have a gender reveal for her 20-year-old “son.”
New York Post reports:
When Adrian Brown told his mother that he was transgender and wanted to transition from female to male, Heather Lundberg Green didn’t know how to support her son.
“When he told me he was transitioning, I was determined to support him through his journey, but I had no idea how,” Green, who’s based in Louisville, Kentucky, wrote in a blog for Love What Matters. “I have always had many friends in the LGBTQ community and still I wasn’t sure what steps I should take as his mother, or even what an appropriate response was outside of ‘I still love you.’”
But she had a clever idea: Throw a gender reveal party to celebrate her son’s 20th birthday. Green coordinated an elaborate photo shoot for her son, where she swaddled him with a white blanket inscribed with “It’s a boy!”
She shared the photos on her Facebook page, which quickly became a social media sensation and attracted more than 10,000 likes.
For parents, we are hard-wired to do everything we can to make our children feel loved and supported, and when a child comes to you and says that they believe they are a gender that is different than the results of their gender reveal, well, it can be confusing.
This mother obviously loves her child, but she is a product of a culture that tells us it is helpful for trans-identifying people to support their dysphoria.
There is no other mental illness that we support by agreeing with a delusion. One’s heart aches for parents who are in the position to tell their child that try as they might, they will never be a boy if they are born a girl. The problem is that this mother is being told by everyone around her that if a girl identifies as a boy, the best thing to do is support that.
There is a difference between being loving and supportive and participating in harmful behavior that has not yet been proven to produce results.
There is no hard data to support the notion that “transitioning” helps someone struggling with gender dysphoria. And for parents who want to love their children who are in this position, they need to advocate for them to get the help they need and address the root cause of this mental illness together.
Not throw a party celebrating something that simply is not.